"The problem with fairy tales is that they set a girl up for disappointment. In real life, the prince goes off with the wrong princess." -- Gossip Girl

i've fallen for your eyes, but they don't know me yet.

aftermath.

abandonment was her matress,

a firm, cold reality
that dreams don't come true.
her heartache collects dust,
and no maid comes to clean it.

as time passes, her memory remains.
a boy from months past
continues to be seen --
in flashes and wishes
and fairytale books.
a toad in disguise
keeps her heart closed; confined.

no bedtime story
or soft, lullabye
can return the hope
that once lived in her mind.
wishes on stars are willed to come true, 
but often,
so often,
they fall out of the sky.

her heart,
not quite broken or missing,
is just simply trapped,
in a world full of dragons and swords.
with no knight coming bravely,
and no kiss on her lips
to help her wake up.

i rant and you unfollow me.

Subtitle: There's a big difference between knowing what you deserve, and believing it exists.

Today in church someone spoke about how often the reason [especially for men] that people aren't married is because they're afraid of commitment.

Everyone... everyone, laughed. Except me.
Straight-faced, I nodded my head. I agree whole-heartedly.

It's like that line from a Taylor Swift song, 'I brace myself for the goodbye, because it's all I've ever known.'

And it's not so much that I'm afraid of committing to someone. I just have a hard time believing that someone will commit to me forever.


And why is there this notion that we have to remain friends with someone who walked away from us? What do I owe them?

If someone is going to commit to me, obviously I will do everything I can to put them first. But if they break that commitment, I resume first priority.

And I do not want to use my time and energy keeping someone happy, who doesn't even want me in their life.

Dating is the worst.

"All your theories on love sound more like the rantings of a bitter and cynical woman." - The Wedding Planner

you took the words right out of my [non-anesthetized] mouth.

Hannah Moore wrote, "So weak is man, so ignorant and blind, that did not God sometimes withhold in mercy what we ask, we should be ruined at our own request."